Gone forever

I actually used to think there were good men in the world; now I don't - they're all the same. I guess it just now depends on the woman, and what she's willing to put up with.
And I realize I should've seen the red flags in my relationship, and deep down I know I knew what was going on. And to put up with that? Stay silent, turn a blind eye because he'd be coming home to me and these girls would be temporary while I'm permanant? No. I am not the one - it's always been all or nothing with me. However, I've come to the greatest conclusion and realization of my life: I'd rather be the one he's cheating with then the one he's cheating on.

Running to Stand Still

I tried to sit and look back on my life to see where it all went wrong. That one point, that one mistake, one decision where I always end up, where I could point at and think, "THAT! That was the beginning of the end."
Needless to say, I sat there for a very long time. Burned plenty of cigarettes, drank jugs of coffee, but surprisingly still, I couldn't find the point.
And then I realized that that had always been my problem. Through all my mistakes, I never cared about the consequences, never cared what it would do to me in the future. And because I didn't care back then, I don't even remember now. I don't remember where it all went wrong.
Maybe it's always been wrong. I'll never know.